Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Cathie Tranent

Cathie T Hostess with mostess of *A.R.S.E

Twisted humouress

**Cathie says: "Just in case I start believing my publicity, here's a little profile Mr Nolan did on me last year .... nothing like a little piss taking to restore normality!! ;p

Ronnie Purcell emailed this to me last week and I wasn’t quite sure why?
I think it was a call for help.

Cathie T is an exceptional artist, writer and photographer, she deserves to be sainted and possibly given a Nobel Peace Prize.

I am writing this because if I don’t Cathie T who is on the other side of my office door will refuse to leave if I don’t. Not only won’t she leave but if I try and make a any effort to depart she will beat me within an inch of my life with the large baseball bat she is brandishing.

I can hear her outside dragging it on the floor talking to her self. Repeating things like:

“I am proud
I am an artist
recognise me or
I’m remove your pelvis”


“Ronnie, Ronnie
write me in a story
if not all they’ll find
will be red and gory”

Frightening stuff really.
I’m starting to wonder if she had anything to do with the disappearing animal’s from the zoo.

She is from Adelaide you know?

Cathie T was born on Christmas day in a stable just outside of Nazareth, her closet friends were sheep…….
…..Hang on I got side tracked It sounds like she’s peeling the plasterboard off the wall .

Start again..

Cathie T was the only daughter of Santa Clause and Mary Christmas who grew up with elves and pixies and wild reindeer…
….. sorry, I keep stuffing up. I do believe she’s eating the books from the waiting room book case.

This whole born on the 25th of December has got me rattled.

Cathie T is a lovely person who encourages others and lives life to the fullest. Check out her portfolio it is full of stuff.

Now if I can only get to a phone and call the cops I might see Christmas as well.

Oh no… damn…. She found the cat.

December 2007


A.R.S.E said...

every word of the above is true

Anonymous said...

Yes...its all true! Cathie is a star...and she makes great art too!

Welcome to Choice Pieces of A.R.S.E - the work of the amazing artists of's Parody, Satire and Lampoon Group!